When my goals don't align with your expectations

When my goals don’t align with your expectations.

It almost feels similar to incarceration.

No matter what I do or don’t,

I feel your eyes watching to see if I will or won’t.

 

And when I break the news that I’m doing something unexpected,

I know your thoughts rush to, how will I be affected.

And when others ask for an explanation,

You rush to defend my strange inclinations.

 

The problem is you see, it’s true.

By association my actions reflect on you.

To be my friend you must condone,

ALL the choices I made on my own.

 

That’s not true you start to say,

It matters not what YOU do all day.

But if you stop and think again,

You might want to get out while you can.

Finding My Place

About a year ago I took down many of my blog posts. I was getting negative reactions from people who were close to me. They were trying to help but their words cut me, made me feel like a horrible person. It's human to question, have doubts and be curious. As a child these qualities are fostered to encourage learning, growth and exploration. Why then, are they looked down upon when we get older? Why is it when someone questions one's core values it is taken as a threat and a defensive shield is put in place. It is not my goal to harm you, to take away what you have or to look down on you. My goal is to find my place in this busy world and figure out what it means to be me.