I find comfort in the songs, sung a capella, in an echoy place.
I find comfort in the benches, hard, but familiar.
I find comfort in the monotonous cadence of the minister as he speaks.
I find comfort in the blessing, the same one I heard as a child.
I find discomfort in the hipocrasy.
I find discomfort in the closed minds.
I find discomfort in the exclusivity.
I find discomfort in the judgement.
I find discomfort in the ideology.
While temporary comfort is a solace, the frog didn't jump out of the pot when it started to boil. His comfortable world warmed up around him and he didn't notice the overall feel. That resulted in his death.
We all know that story and how it goes, so why do I keep jumping between the hot pot, that I know is hot and a cooler one. Why do I feel the need to sit back down on that hard bench and hear that monotonous voice when I disagree with every other word? When I no longer find solace in that hot kettle and I am searching for one that won't boil over and leave me feeling empty.
Wow, that really rings true for me. I left the FALC a few years ago, and there are definitely different stages to go through. I can really identify with many of your posts. What helped me was realizing the difference between faith and religion. Wishing you the best.
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Thanks, it is good to know that I'm not alone in this. I know I have faith, its the religion part I struggle with. And sorting through what I do and do not believe in. I feel like I am doing well and then something comes up and I am two steps back. I am working on it!
ReplyDeleteIt seems pretty judgmental and hypocritical when I read you lumping us all together as being exclusive and close-minded. I am an individual.
ReplyDeleteAgain, I hear YOUR perception of who you think I am. Is your perception accurate?
This isn't directed at an individual. I think most people feel uncomfortable with hypocrisy and exclusivity in general. I'm sorry if you were offended.
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ReplyDeleteJan, I have talked to some who have reached this point and chosen to stay for various reasons, I have talked to others who choose to slip out the side door. I respect both decisions and admire the owners for their ability to sort things through. I too am sorting this through. Perhaps I will choose to believe for myself as you say, but regardless, I must choose for myself. I appreciate your concern and willingness to share your personal story.
ReplyDeletewe don't all believe the exact same way about everything, even though it may seem like it at times. the forgiveness of sins is what is important, the rest is people's personal convictions, how they interpret the bible and what they've truly come to feel is right. imho. not everyone "buys into" the culture as much as you'd think.
ReplyDeleteAs for the judging, hypocrasy, etc; we're human, just like everyone else. maybe as a group we seem worse than everyone else because you know us better than any other group of people.
"a church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum of saints"
just because a person holds a different set of opinions, doesn't mean they have a closed mind. they may have put a lot more thought into it than you'd suspect, and wound up at a different conclusion.
Good luck, whatever your choice is, i hope it brings you peace, and that you're always welcome "back home"
Actually, the judging, hypocrisy and shunning of those who leave the FALC is a pretty serious issue. I was in the FALC church for over twenty years and am not speaking from a place of anger or resentment. It is beyond explanation how it is ok to cut and curl one's hair and wear perfume but it is not ok to wear mascara (unless now it's ok, hmmm, how those changes can happen over time, no longer a "sin" ha), it is beyond explanation as to why and organ is ok in church but a violin is not (the slippery slope answer to many of these is ludicrous), it is so far beyond explanation that I still to this day hear of FALC members that proudly proclaim they "do NOT have a tv or go to the movies" but they are on the internet ALL THE TIME. That, my dear sister in Christ, is hypocrisy.
DeleteThen comes the judgement. For FALCers to profess they are the only believers on this planet is absolutely stupefying. Did you know there's a tiny Baptist congregation in the south that believes the same thing? I met a woman last week that is still trying to pull her life together after leaving her church and dealing with all the emotional baggage that comes along with leaving a corrupted church claiming to be the ONLY truth bearers. She is in the same position as all these broken people that left the FALC and all the other split Lasestadian factions. Christianity is not supposed to feel like that simply because one Christian decides to worship in another building with another title.
I have been a member of various LCMS Lutheran churches for many years now, and never once, (I mean it is so laughable to even think about it), have I ever felt like less of a Christian for needing to change congregations. I would see former church members in the grocery store and we would actually talk and catch up, no shunning, no awkwardness (unlike the vibes I get running into form FALC, it is nutso).
Yes, all of mankind are sinners, in every church there is. But NO, NO, NO, not all churches are filled with such a spiritually bankrupt form of religion that completely breaks it's members when they decide they need to be a Christian without all the emotional mess that comes along with places like FALC. And, just plain turns many of those who leave the church off from Christianity and religion all together. Just these rules based, judging, "we're the only ones" type churches mess their members up like that. There has to be a reason for this common thread to go through soooo many people writing on the internet about it, it really isn't just them...it really, truly, is YOU (devout members of FALC). Problem is, you, Anonymous from Nov 4 and all the others will never see a healthy church, preaching the true Christian belief (that I know you profess) of free salvation to all that believe God sent His Son Jesus to die on the cross for our sins, because you are stuck behind your walls...being extremely unChristianlike to many within your walls, that they are willing to go through pure Hell to leave you.
At some point I wonder if the Holy Spirit will whisper loudly enough in your ears to drop the most evil of your ways, proclaiming that you all are the only true Christians. That is pure blasphemy.
Read these blogs, listen with open ears, your system is a mess and is hurting so many people, severing families, shunning who you declare are unbelievers (trust me, if you're not in the FALC anymore, no matter how long you've been out, no matter that you have no family ties back there anymore, no matter that you are a part of a great Christian community...your sick lie of being the only true believers, sits somewhere in the back of almost all of our heads, you are wrong with that and should just stop that claim already, how pompous and destructive!
I appreciate the gesture, your right about the church/hospital analogy. I agree. I will also say that every group has its good and bad eggs. There are plenty of friendships and people from the church who I respect and admire. As for beliefs, I believe in the forgiveness of sins and I agree its important. It the culture that you mention that puts me on edge. While we are all human, I feel the church is not very welcoming to people who dont fit the profile, while we claim to accept anyone who is truly searching, how many african americans do we have? How many indians? Is that due to them, or us? I am in search of peace, and I hope I find it too, but its a personal journey that may take a while. Family will always be home to me.
ReplyDeleteWell, first, most people are born into the church, and are Finn. So that's going to be the majority. And the towns around the churches are 90% + white, so there aren't going to be many diverse people winding up in the pews. even non- FALC/LLC scandanavians are notoriously shy around new people. I honestly can't think of a single incident where a new comer was treated badly/ made to feel unwelcome.
ReplyDeleteI have personal experience bringing "outsiders" to my former FALC church and they being stared at, not approached and welcomed. It was also quite well known that you were automatically stigmatized if you dated someone from outside the church. I have personally witnessed teenage guests being brought to church services and being stared at (they had mascara on, not gaudy or inappropriate for church going), and whispered about by other girls (saw it with my own eyes). I have experienced most friends that were brought to church felt uncomfortable and never returned. I witnessed first hand a gal come into the church and after some time her parents fearing she was part of a cult. People don't make this stuff up. You have never witnessed a single incident I believe, because you are comfortably ensconced in your family of 15, married someone from church, never broke "the rules" and have never brought a guest to church. Of course, then, you'll never feel uncomfortable there and would be extremely pleased with the safety and protection you must feel in your sheltered experience that leaves no Grace for those unlike you.
DeleteAmen!
DeleteWhile your argument holds weight in some areas, I would argue that Twin cities metro area is not 90% white, nor is Farmington Hills MI, Zion is only 59.2% White. If one were to go by the Christmas edition of GOP, it would suggest that not one African American Adult, is going to heaven, I do have a problem with this. What makes a Finn more heaven acceptable? I don't know if any new comers have been treated poorly but that isn't the point, in my mind God loves more people and I don't understand how FALC could be the only way he lets people into heaven.
ReplyDeletewell i guess here we have an example of "not everyone in the church feels that way". I don't think we're the only ones going to heaven. Art S. has even said that at one point there were branches of our church in Hungary (?) and other places, that couldn't afford to send their missionaries to the annual meetings (back in the day when travel was harder and more expensive) and that there are other people out there who believe in the forgiveness of sins. and there are probably people who have read the bible and came to that conclusion on their own too. ALOT of churches (for example, Catholic and Mennonite, and some around your hometown) believe in the forgiveness of sins, they just don't agree that it should be no strings attached, or that there should be as much focus on it as the FALC feels.
ReplyDeleteI know a former Mennonite-now-somewhat-Catholic, and he mentioned when he was leaving the Mennonite church, "his dad and uncles gave him a hard time, but he told them that the forgiveness of sins could be found in a lot of churches". So here was this guy, a random person from around the area, who leads a VERY different life style than me, who actually shares my beliefs. it blew my mind! You never know.
the forgiveness of sins is what i believe in because it makes sense to me. if someone believes in something else, maybe thats just what they're meant to believe in/ what God has planned for their life, and i'll leave it to Him to decide whether or not they'll go to Heaven. I've never thought that we were the only ones, and I also feel that some non-Christian religions other than have God and the forgiveness of sins, they just call them by different names.
As far as diversity, are there many Finns that are Southern Baptist? Should that reflect poorly on the Southern Baptist Church? Different people are drawn to different styles of worship, and you know as well as anyone that the FALC doesn't go out and try recruit new members. The beliefs/ church came to the upper midwest with the Finns, and since we don't recruit, it shouldn't be a surprise that the congregations have stayed mainly Finn.
Well if that is the way that you believe, then we are on the exact same page, I am glad we have found common ground. I believe in the forgiveness of sins and its importance, I just don't believe that FALC is the only way to heaven and lately I have been thinking that it is perhaps not the best fit. I believe the doctrine of FALC is sound, it just may not be for me.
Delete"ALOT of churches (for example, Catholic and Mennonite, and some around your hometown) believe in the forgiveness of sins..." See, it's this kind of thinking that astounds me. Um...are you aware that anyone that calls themselves a Christian believes in salvation through the birth of Christ and his death on the cross (due to our sinful nature) and his resurrection? I mean, the way you write it you sound like you think there are A Lot (like maybe 50-100 churches, including, some Catholics and a former Mennonite), whereas Christianity exists throughout the entire world, each and every one of them proclaiming their salvation through the death of Christ for their sins. Yes, the Catholics attach works to that belief, so what, am I God to judge how that's going to work out in the end, nope, and neither is FALC (which, you may not judge others, but the overwhelming majority do and will shun you as an unbeliever if you leave). I pray that the Holy Spirit will begin to work in the lives of FALC type congregations to allow their hearts to open up and realize they do not have a stronghold on the concept of Forgiveness of Sins. This is the basic tenant to all of Christianity and believed by millions (if not billions) across the globe.
DeleteIt's true the frog died, poor frog, but people also die in thier Apostolic Lutheran feathered nest,people believe everything that is spoken from the pulpit. I did that too until everything in my life hit the fan,and I found myself on the outside. Finding myself on the outside was painful,so painful that I decided to read thfe Bible for myself. When I started reading Romans ,corinthians and Galatians then I realized I had never been taught the Gospel of grace. They are relatively short books. Every Apostolic should read them...
ReplyDeleteReading the bible is something ever Christian should do, not only ever apostolic. It is important to know where your beliefs come from and what they are based off of. I'm glad you found comfort there.
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